Affection

I am starting to realize how much of an affectionate person I am. This really makes me full of joy and I think it is because of my mom. As a disclaimer, I love my mom more than I thought I could love anyone. We have a special bond that I don't think is like other mother-daughter relationships I've seen. So what I am about to say is not suppose to be a total negative look at her, but my mom is just not an affectionate person. It's funny because we both probably look totally awkward if we ever hug or kiss each other. That part of us is actually kind of new. I know this might sound weird, but this is what I meant about us having a different kind of relationship. She does not really think to hug people in greeting them, her way of comforting is normally in words or in an act of service. She is not a physical touch woman. It is cool to see how God had her marry a totally affectionate man though! My dad was ALL about physical touch! I know that most men probably are, but he was in the sweetest sense. I remember every single night that he would come home from work, I was normally on the couch doing homework or watching tv and he would always come in "Hey Sweets!!" And come and kiss me on my forehead and stroke my hair as he asked how my day was before he went to change clothes. Every single night! And then some nights or days that I would be in my room for an extended period of time, he would come upstairs and start hugging on me and just wanting to talk. He needed to touch me in some way every time I entered a room. It used to get on my last nerves and I would pull the whole, "daaaad!!" haha. I miss it now though. He was the same with my mom. I remember on Sunday afternoons, they would normally curl up on the couch together and fall asleep watching football. I didn't realize until now how precious that was for me to observe. I got to truly see my parents be loving their entire 26 years of marriage. What a gift! (Thank you, Lord!). So in finding that I am more like my dad really soothes me. Internally, I always had the fear that I would be more closed to affection like my mom. Although, it isn't that she is closed, that just isn't her personality. But I find that I just love physical touch. I am starting to be like my dad...with every friend I see and even new ones that I greet, I have to touch them. I know once I get into a relationship, we may be sitting in a restaurant, and I will be the one who will need to reach out every now and then just to have him touch me for a few seconds, then I'll be fine :). I love cuddling, hand holding, hugging, kissing, a simple brush of the arm, fingers through the hair, arm around me as I walk. Even as I type these things, I smile. I find that I end up blogging a lot about what warms my heart, but I truly do feel that! A warmth in my heart when things are just how they should be. I'm glad God created us to be people of love and affection. I'm glad I am a touchy expression of affection.